Forever
by PhobicBee
Summary: Will you catch me if I fall?".Shane/Lilly. AU.


**Disclaimer – I don't own HM or CR.**

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She'd said that she'd _always_ be there for him no matter what.

The first time she'd said that he'd been six and nursing a scraped knee and she had been four and tiny. And he'd believed her because with her long blonde hair and big blue eyes she looked like an angel and he had believed her because he knew angels wouldn't tell lies.

He had been thrilled to find her because for six years of his life he had been wishing that an angel would come and tell him that everything could be okay. And though she was much tinier than him, she was angelic enough for him to believe in something.

He grew up and she grew up too, both of them attached at the hip. And she stuck to her promise. His faith which had been broken many a time by his own parents had been restored by a tiny angelic looking girl with the attitude of a devil.

She stuck by his side and they weathered everything that came their way. And for a while he felt invincible. Because when she was by his side he wouldn't fall. She just _wouldn't_ let him fall. His childhood years were the happiest years of his life. And then came teenage with all its aches and pains

When he was fourteen and distressed by the changes happening all around him she was there for him. Spending summer days lying in the backyard talking about nothing. Just allowing the sun to beat down upon them as their words disappeared into the air and the shimmer of the sunlight. She listened to everything he ranted about and murmured soothing promises. And he thought everything was _really_ going to be okay.

The next summer he went off to camp. When he came back he looked for her, to show her what he'd become. And when he saw tears in her big blue eyes he knew something was wrong.

"You've changed Shane," she whispered as if her heart was breaking. And he knew his was seeing her cry like this. And when he looked at himself the way he spoke and behaved, he knew he had changed. And it wasn't for the better.

But she didn't forget her promise of forever. He fell so many times because he couldn't bear to see the disappointment in her eyes but she still was there. She caught him whenever he was about to fall and picked him up whenever she was down.

And those moments of clarity brought about by the rush of alcohol in his bloodstream told him that he didn't deserve such kindness. And he told her as much.

"I made a promise. Now go to sleep." She would say as she drew the blankets over him. He didn't see the kisses she dropped on his head and nor did he hear the whispered sentiments of love. He only saw the disappointment and sadness.

He'd see her everyday in school. Walking as if the weight of the world were on her shoulders. And he knew with a sinking feeling every single time that he was responsible for whatever weighed her down.

Not being able to confront her head on, he wanted to be able to do at least something to ease that burden. And anyone knew that if they messed with Lilly Truscott they would have to answer to him. But no word of this ever traveled back to her. She didn't know she had a shining knight with quite a few chinks in his armor.

At times he wanted her to just stay away from him. He wanted to prove to her that he was worthless and useless. He wanted her know that he was nothing like the boy she thought he was.

Because he was drowning amongst all the mess he had created for himself and he did not want to drag her down with him too. But she still wouldn't let go.

And one night he couldn't take it anymore.

"Why do you do this?" he asked her as she pulled him up the stairs and onto his bed. She didn't reply but merely led him to the bed. She pulled the covers over him and smoothed the hair out of his face before moving away from the bed. But before she could move far away he caught hold of her slim wrist and tugged on it.

"Why do you do this?" he asked once more, insistently.

"Because I love you and I said I'd always be there for you," she said wearily as she sat down on the edge of the bed.

"Why do you love me?" he asked as he turned over on his side, still holding her hand. What did she see in him? Didn't she see that he was irrevocably lost? That there was no hope for him. That he was _just_ a train wreck waiting to happen.

"Because I know that the boy I used to know is still in there somewhere. And I love you so much that I just cant stand by and see you crash and burn." She turned around to face him, the faint moonlight catching the glimmer of tears in her eyes.

He started up at her answer. He didn't know she did everything because she loved him. He had always thought he was just another obligation of hers. Because she was a conscientious and kind person couldn't just watch and old friend self-destruct. Not because, not because _she loved him_.

He sat up and pulled her close to him. He hooked a finger under her chin and lifted her face up, her eyes were shining with tears. He could even see that in the darkness. And he wanted to kick himself for having been the cause of her distress.

"I love you Lilly."

There, he had finally said those four words he had been dying to say when he had seen her one summer day when they were fourteen, lying in the sun, the sunlight catching her hair and her eyes sparkling.

He brought her face close to his and kissed her slowly. She tasted like what he always imagined she would taste like. Of cherries and happiness. His arms wound around her as he drew as close to him as humanly possible.

Now that he had her he never wanted to let her go.

He brought her down on the bed as gently as possible and covered her with the blankets. She smiled up at him and he smiles back at her. He only had one question to ask her.

"Will you catch me if I fall?"

"Always."

And that was all he ever really needed to hear.


End file.
